Anxiety and Coffee Creamer

Yesterday I learned a tough lesson.

I really wanted some coffee creamer and wanted to get out of the house. I got myself ready, took all my meds, hit my inhaler and drove to our local walmart. Our walmart has a mask rule and I put on my mask and made my way to the one entrance on the other side of the parking lot.

I ended up having a coughing spell in produce and I panicked. I got dirty looks from other customers, saw one older gentleman look at me twice and abandon his cart and walk away. I slowly made my way to an aisle where no one was around and took off my mask so I could properly get my breathing back under control.  I put my mask back over my face properly and I eventually got the few things I needed (and my coffee creamer) and made my way to self-checkout and got out of the store.  Thankfully, I was able to reach my husband who helped me calm down and level out my breathing during that episode.

I got home, put away the things I bought and took a very long Saturday nap.

My coughing spell could have happened in any store in the area and the logical side of my brain knows this. While the coughing was going on and I was inwardly panicking and petrified some employee or security guard would come and force me to leave the store.  Let me be clear, this did not happen!

I realized that I can ask for help and should not have over extended myself by making that trip to walmart. I hate the thought of having to ask for help but I just have to get over that.

Today I was blessed to attend my church worship services and I will always be thankful for my church family.

I am not protesting the masks, I willingly wear a mask when I enter a store or attend church. At church, once I find a seat, I take off my mask for worship service.