Chosen

 Do you know that Christians are called by God to be his people?

 By the way they live their lives you can tell they have different priorities and beliefs.

In the parable of the Ninety & Nine a sheep herder gathers up his herd and secures the 99 that were found and goes out to the brambles, bushes and mountains to find the 1 that is missing.  

God waits for us and God has his arms open for our return. There used to be a bumper sticker that read God allows U-Turns. This simply means that no matter how far you think you are from God, you can change your direction and return to God and you WILL be welcomed. 

I spent years fighting, depressed and in despair and in a miserable marriage not knowing how I was ever going to have any peace. 

2010 was a year of changes for me and my family in many ways. This was a year of turmoil, sadness and fear as well. I knew my marriage was going to end. In fact, ex #2 would ask for a divorce on the way to a camping trip up in Fall Creek Falls. You cannot tell in the photos, but I was very sad and tried very hard to make the best of being near nature in spite of the horrible mental mess I was in. 

In the fall of 2010, after a particularly fight-filled morning, I was at my mental end and called my kids told them I loved them and held a pistol to my head and my finger was on the trigger.  God stopped my hand and I would spend 7 days in the Psych Ward at Vandy.  God rescued me from that pit of despair and sent people to feed into my life even when I didn't feel like I deserved to live. 

I came home with new meds and a new counseling schedule and started reading my bible again. I wanted to attend church but felt too damaged to set foot in any church, so I watched/listened to bible lessons on the computer.

2011 would be more changes as I would go back to work for the State and was SO honored to be an employee of the TN Veterans Affairs & Veteran's Cemetery.  By the end of 2011, I would be living In Warner Robins, GA in an effort to give my marriage one more shot (yes, I was still trying to hold it together at this time). 

2012 would arrive and so would the same arguments, his cheating, his stealing and disappearing acts. We visited 2 churches in Warner Robins, but neither was a good fit for the both of us. I kept praying while he made fun of my faith. Everything finally came to end on May 18, 2012 when he moved out and I told him not to come back.  We had one more cordial meeting after that to make lists of who would pay for what and how everything would be divided.  He drove /moved me back to TN and helped me load my life and possessions into a storage unit in Dickson, TN. I moved back in with my parents in late July of 2012 and took a job with a book store. The first Sunday that arrived once I moved back, I walked into Covenant Church and saw friendly faces that I knew from when I had attended another congregation years before in Dickson. 

Since the end of July 2012, I have considered Covenant Church my home church. Pastor Wes and the congregation have always been kind to me and I truly cannot consider another group my church family. 

They have collectively helped me pray for many things and gotten me through many ups and downs both personally and by extension my family as well. 

I am so very thankful God Chose Me and continues to guide my steps every day of my life. 

I am only here on this earth by the grace of God and may I never rest on my own understanding. I pray I always give God the glory for every blessing as he carries me from Glory to Glory.